Often the best communicators are the ones using the fewest words! The more we write or the longer we speak for doesn’t mean we are showing off our best communication skills. We can all be guilty of letting words creep in to our sentences that are simply filling space, but there are also words we use in completely the wrong way
Let’s explore:
1.Really:
We can be tempted to add ‘really’ to sentences thinking it adds power to our sentence, some of us can be really, really guilty of adding it twice! There’s power behind the statements we make and making them shorter can carry more impact. Adding really doesn’t make a sentence any more true.
Are you sure?
Are you really sure?
Are you really, really sure?
2. Very
Very isn’t very specific and often we will add it to sentences instead of testing ourselves and using different words. Think about what you are trying to say, if you are happy does adding very help? If being happy just isn’t going to cut it instead of being very happy how about being ecstatic or delighted?
Whilst it isn’t wrong to say very or really the overuse of these words means the impact is lost. Think about the best way you can get your message across and the power it carries when you say something. The more you say something and add it to your sentence the less it becomes true, the same can be said about the word amazing.
3. Stuff/Things
Stuff and things fall firmly in the box of making you look like you do not know what you are talking about or you can not be bothered to explain. Whilst people do not expect you to go in to full detail about every little thing there are better words you can use. What things do you have to do? What stuff has come up which means you have to cancel on your friends? You can give a short update, you are busy with your family, you have calls to make or emails to get back to.
4. Literally
Literally means that things are true, that the words you are saying are correct word for word. Think about the last time you heard this word used “I am literally the most hungry”, “this lesson is literally the most boring thing ever”, “I am literally the worst person at maths”. When we use the word literally we think it adds emphasis but think about it before you use it how true is it. As a word that is overused it can make you seem a little silly.
5. Honestly
When we tell a story or give information adding the word honestly at the end implies that something else you have said has been a lie. We shouldn’t need to be adding this word to answers to questions or stories at all.
6. Like (umm, ahhh, so, well)
Like is a sneaky little filler word that can find it’s way in to our conversations far too often. It is one of the fastest ways to indicate that you are nervous or unprepared. When we are put on the spot we can rely too much on this word – never be afraid to take a pause after someone has asked you question, think about what you want to say and you will find your responses are more confident.
7. Just
“I just wanted to let you know”, “can I just ask you a question”
Adding just to a sentence adds a sense of nervousness, drop the just and add an air of confidence to your statements or questions. Give it a go and see if it works for you.
8. That
This one isn’t always clear cut but often the term ‘that’ isn’t needed in a sentence. There is a way to test it, read your sentence aloud and then again without the word ‘that’ in it, if it still makes sense then lose the word! The one time it’s never alright to use ‘that’ is when referring to people. “I have lots of friends that live close by…” We need to be using the word ‘who’ instead.
The words above are all about the context in which you use them, we aren’t saying that you should never use these words, but you should pay more attention to what you are saying and how you can share messages in a clearer way. Research suggests that our attention span is around 8 seconds, this means most people are only listening to you for a really short time, the longer we take to get to the point and fill our sentences with words that aren’t required the less likely we are to get what we want out of the conservation.
Challenge:
Let’s pretend you are preparing for an interview for college/university or a job, prepare what you would say in response to the questions.
- try and answer straight away
- think about your response for 3 minutes
- write down what you would say
Each time keep your eyes and ears peeled for any of the buzzwords we don’t need to use.
Questions:
Q1: Tell me about your hobbies and interests
Q2: Tell me what your biggest strength/skill is
